Archive for August, 2013

Good is a Choice

Friday, August 23rd, 2013

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 I was in Las Vegas and I sat down at the Roulette table and got 100 dollars in chips. I won, I lost. I lost again. I looked at the people at the table placing opposite bets from me and realized they were secretly praying too. But I’m the minister right…I have to win. I’ve got the most spiritual power here. I tried to intuitively pick the right numbers. I tried to deductively realize I had been divinely guided to this table at the right time. I tried to telekinetically get the ball to land on my number in the wheel. As the roulette wheel span I wondered, “Is this the futility of prayer? To ask to win? To ask for more?” Is prayer about asking for what is, or is it about utilizing what you’ve been given?”

“Yes,” was the answer…this was futile prayer. Yet, I did get another answer. Enjoy life. Have fun. Choose good.

 Regardless of outcome, choose the good.

  And that I think is a fundamental spiritual question… Is good something we create or is good something we choose?

 If good is something we create, good is the result of skills, luck, gambling, magic and control.

 If good is a choice it means that good is the privilege of a clear mind and a grateful heart.

The good is never outside of us, the good is always in our choices. Not just in what we choose but in the choosing.

 Maybe I’m just saying that cause I lost my hundred dollars at roulette, but I do love this idea that Good is always here, that love is always here, that fulfillment is always here, but it must be chosen.

  Ernest Holmes said, “The gift of life is not complete until it is accepted.”

 Good is not a possession it is a choice. Love is not a possession it is a choice. Peace is not a possession it is a choice.

It’s always there.

  We are making things difficult for ourselves when we start making our good dependent on something other than choice. In fact, we start opposing our good because we start denying ourselves the freedom. For good is closely related to freedom…good is the freedom to grow, to love, to enjoy. When we start measuring or comparing our good to another’s, we start to lose it and it becomes dependent.

Does that mean give up on good? No, it means return it to your choice.

 When your on your couch and your wondering what to do next…choose good. When your channel surfing your mind for different channels of memories while your going to sleep…choose good. When you’re your grumpy and it is hot and you could snap at someone, don’t…choose good.

What if You’re Wrong?

Friday, August 9th, 2013

  I once counseled a woman who had a central story she told herself about her love life.  “God,” she said, “Does not want me to be loved.” 

  She told me her story. Crystal was born a girl, but her mother had really wanted a boy. Her mother often told her the reason Crystal was so homely is because she was supposed to be a boy.

  In her late teens, Crystal did meet someone and they married and had a child, but it didn’t last long. He left her and his duties as a father. Although she had her son, she was“alone” again.

  It was safe to say that Crystal had a couple boyfriends. They would move in and out of her life like a season. When they needed a place to stay or someone to love them, they headed Crystal’s way. Crystal was an incredibly loving person. Each boyfriend seemed to understand Crystal’s belief that she was not meant to be loved. Crystal told me, “They came because they knew they wouldn’t have to give me anything in return.”

  Hearing Crystal’s story and how much of her life was based on it, I certainly had compassion for her. There was only one question I could ask, however. “What if you’re wrong?”

  “What if God does want you to be loved?” For Crystal this idea not only fundamentally challenged the way she lived, “I am here for others, not the other way around,” but her sense of purpose.

  Crystal was only forty years old. There was time for meaningful love. Sometimes significant change doesn’t come from creating a new story, but simply by having a willingness to let the current story go.

  Perhaps there’s a story you’ve been telling yourself about who you are or about the way life is, that’s served its purpose? We should be willing to ask ourselves, “What if I’m wrong?” Let us not rush to a new story to tell ourselves, but open ourselves to the possibilities of what might be–a truth that we don’t have to narrate, but that is already there, ready to be told if we are willing to accept it.